A journey of self-discovery: learning that perfection doesn't exist

“To Teach is to come face-to-face with failure and setbacks on a regular basis. The sooner we realise that perfection is a myth and growth is the goal, the sooner we are able to learn from our mistakes and improve our teaching” (Fraser, 2012, p. 65).

I guess perfection is something I’ve always tried to strive for. Ironic isn’t it, when I know perfection doesn’t exist. That much I learnt on my first practicum.

As a beginner on this journey of teaching, I obviously did not have the most effective management techniques practiced and handy to pull out. That was something I reflected on after taking my first lesson. Then I beat myself up when not managing well the second time round. I was told by my associate teacher, “don't be too hard on yourself”, managing is about what feels right for you. And it wasn’t until the very end that it finally clicked.

Throughout my teaching practicum, I noted classroom management techniques and carefully observed. These notes would serve for later reference of what to do in each situation to deal with what sorts of circumstances. While I observed and listened carefully, trying to figure out what the ‘right’ thing was to do in each situation, I felt almost helpless coming across so many different situations. And then it hit me. Coming through that first finish line, I realised that teaching is no manual book approach. That manual book I was possibly trying to create? Well, I wouldn’t say it’s useless, those noted management techniques are simply possibilities of what could be done, what I could do. But in the end, it’s about what I feel is right.

Gibbs (2006) wrote that “becoming a teacher is a journey – a journey that always begins with ourselves,” but for me, I also see it as a journey of self-discovery. It’s about finding out my own philosophies, my own beliefs, finding out what feels right and works for me. Just as it is not anyone else’s but my own unique journey, it is not about what works and feels right for anyone else, but works and feels right for me.

While I’ve just begun the journey of becoming a teacher, I am still in the process of figuring out what feels right for me. While on this journey, I reinforce to myself Fraser’s (2012) point that it is ok to make mistakes. Reflect, look, but don’t stare, move on. Because the journey ahead is still long and only by coming to terms with the fact that perfection doesn’t exist can I keep moving forward.



References

Fraser, D. (2012). The Work and Artistry of Teaching. In C. McGee & D.
Fraser (Eds). The Professional Practice of Teaching (4th ed., pp. 55-75). South Melbourne, Vic., Australia: Cengage Learning.
Gibbs, C. (2006). To be a teacher: Journeys towards authenticity. Auckland,
New Zealand: Pearson.