It had been my belief that a primary school teacher plays the important role of a facilitator who guides children in their development. After gaining more experiences, my thoughts have evolved and I now entwine with that the importance of relationships. I still do believe that teachers act as a guide to development for children, but in order to best provide for the children’s needs, one must first know who they are providing for and what their needs may be. That way, teachers are in a better position to make decisions in teaching.
Each child has their own unique stories and past that makes them who they are. I think taking the time to get to know some of these stories behind children is important – it’s about getting to know the children as people. Coming from a psychology background, I think there is a reason for everything and that includes a child’s behavior. In the classic case, the ‘trouble maker’ doesn’t simply act to annoy you, he may do so for attention due to parental neglect at home. It’s important to learn these stories behind the children so you can do something about it, do something with the information you learn. For example, you could give the child positive attention by taking the time to ask about them a few minutes before class – actually having a conversation with them and making them feel as if they are cared for.
I was taking a group of 6-7 year olds for maths today and one of the tasks was to draw 8 fish in a pond and colour 5 of them red and 3 yellow. I happened to be working with 2 quite ‘trouble maker’ boys whom I had to separate. Instead of doing their work, they’d been playing with some rocks they had and like I’ve seen done so many times by a teacher, I threatened to take away the distracting toy if they didn’t get on with their work. While one of the boys mocked me after I told him to get on with his work, saying “or you’ll do what? Get angry and growl at us?” and slamming his hands on the table for effect, the other boy refused to do the task after much cajoling. The mockery gave me a little bit of a wakeup call and I realised that the instinctual management strategy of telling them off was obviously not working. I thought back to my teaching philosophies and past experiences. I really didn’t know the kids that well, after all, it was only one morning a week I saw them but there had to be something with each child that I could reach out to. So I sat down beside one of the boys and asked about the stone he was playing with. I didn’t bother trying to tell him to do his work anymore – I didn’t quite know what I was doing yet but somehow, I needed to stick to my philosophies and make it work. Surprisingly, the boy opened up to me. Instead of giving me evil eyes and grumbling ‘no’, he talked to me. And I conversed back with him. Like people do. Somehow I got the bright idea of suggesting he draw rocks like his one in the pond (instead of fish – but hey, we were getting somewhere) and he did it! Instead of ending up with 5 red fish and 3 yellow, he ended up with 5 red stones and 3 yellow ones but I figured the main point of the task had been met so all was well. See, it wasn’t that he couldn’t do the task as it might have appeared to be on the outside without further probing – it was simply an issue of motivation that required the teacher to know something about the child.
I think it is through these relationships we build with the children that we can build a positive classroom culture and making teaching and learning better.
I began to wonder about the other boy who had mocked me. It occurred to me that he was probably always being told off for being off task, he’s probably used to it and always expects it – hence why he mocked me, expecting I would growl him. I wonder if and would really like to be able to prove another way of interacting with him that goes with my philosophies. Telling him off obviously hasn’t been working that well anyway.
To be honest, that is my natural instinct. In the moment of things, it can be so easy to revert to being the naggy, snappish teacher who says ‘don’t do that!’ etc. but being positive is something I am aiming for. It’s something I want in my classroom and it’s something I have to keep reminding myself of.
